We have all done it, myself included, leaving tasks incomplete. Why do we do this to our selves? Are we just being lazy and bored with the task at hand or just leaving it for later for something to do when we are truly bored with nothing else to do?
Well looking at the first part, some tasks that are set upon us whether by accident, design, or that boss with the Roman Empire fetish, whatever the cause, they JUST have to be done no matter what. Then there is the little tasks. Sub tasks as it were, with no real purpose other than to keep us busy and playing with our toes while we are work. Sometimes the task is just to involved to be tackled all at once and needs to be spread out over time. In which case someone who has come in the middle or near the end of the task with no concept of whats happened may look at it and say your just being lazy and don't want to get it done. While they don't know the extent of what your doing, or how much time you have involved yourself into the task, to them its just incomplete.
Then there are the tasks that get set aside, not because you don't have enough time to do them, they are just mindless tasks that if given a reasonable amount of thought about, they aren't worth the time that is assigned to them to be done. Something like this I believe would be summed up the way Hollywood sums up things, there are no small parts, just small actors.
Which lastly for now at least, are the tasks that we set up to do we get started, then come back to whenever we really have nothing else to do. I was guilty of this most of the time and still a little bit yet today. I will start something and I do intend to finish it sometime, but not now. Just when I really have nothing else to do and everything else that really had to get done at some point or wasn't important enough to do right away but yet had to be finished sooner rather than later was done and what was left was the things that I left myself to do just for the sake of killing time, which I think in the state of New York is an offense punishable by having to live there.
Well with the twist of lime or time, now you have done it and killed a little time from reading this post today. Now you have to move to New York. It's the law.
(Void in any sane mind. Your millage may vary)
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Saturday, December 27, 2008
And the loneliness fills my heart.
Well here it is just a few days from my birthday, and I will be yet another year older.
During this time in a persons life, most would have family and friends around them or at least hope to as its not like it's a national holiday or anything but something more personable to each one of us. Some dread it coming while others look forward to each and every one. Mostly those who are not old enough to do things that someone a few years older or so is already able to do. Vote, drink, drive, or make the bigger decisions that will affect their lives for years to come for the good or the bad. Growing up the youngest kid in a some what large family, you would think that there would be stronger ties between us all, yet there are so few that have held us together. Lately, it seems the only thing that keeps us together is simple gravity. As none of any of us live anywhere near each other its hard to keep in touch. Sure we have the internet today, phones, snail mail... But yet, even with the things that should help bring us closer together it also pushes us further apart at the same time. When I was younger, hadn't yet been married, had kids and divorced, I had spent a lot of my time alone. Usually walking someplace, watching TV, or trying to solve a problem on the computer when I used to program on my old Apple ][e. Being alone then it bothered me a little, sometimes I enjoyed it but being young I was always able to find something to do to keep myself from feeling alone in life, but now.... I can't see the same things in my life to keep me distracted like I could then.
What about your friends? you may be asking.. When I was younger I move round a lot and finding true friends was not easy to find. Sometimes ended up around the wrong type of people that were going to get me nowhere but trouble. Sadly that did happen a time or two, however I was able to be able to keep myself from getting in to deep into all that. But not enough it seems that the history is still there and it effected my growth as an individual.
So, am I going around throwing kittens in to trees, running down people and robbing liquor stores? Well OBVIOUSLY NOT! However the every man for himself attitude seems to rubbed off on me and as such its been hard for me to learn to trust others, as when I had trusted the people around me they turned against me in most ways that its not even worth mentioning here. So here I sit.... Alone... Trying to trust others and being left disappointed every time I try. Do I stop trying? No. I take precautions and keep the people around me at a "safe" distance from me and not letting them in all the way, or at the very least only letting them know what only whats important at the time. Always worried that they will try to do the same thing that the others in my past have done to take advantage of me.
When I was married, I still was unable to fill that void. Not that I didn't try to fill it with what I could do, but I failed it seems. At some point I may give up trying, but not today. Or anytime soon I hope. Sometimes I wonder with the adversities that I had experienced in my life why I never turned to drugs or alcohol to try to fill the gaps in my life. I always attributed it to having a strong will, but at the same time that strong will is crushing my life in to the loneliness that I bare today.
Well until that loneliness that fills me can be replaced with something or someone that I can believe in 100%. As I don't see that happening anytime soon, I will trudge along in life, alone and lonely.
During this time in a persons life, most would have family and friends around them or at least hope to as its not like it's a national holiday or anything but something more personable to each one of us. Some dread it coming while others look forward to each and every one. Mostly those who are not old enough to do things that someone a few years older or so is already able to do. Vote, drink, drive, or make the bigger decisions that will affect their lives for years to come for the good or the bad. Growing up the youngest kid in a some what large family, you would think that there would be stronger ties between us all, yet there are so few that have held us together. Lately, it seems the only thing that keeps us together is simple gravity. As none of any of us live anywhere near each other its hard to keep in touch. Sure we have the internet today, phones, snail mail... But yet, even with the things that should help bring us closer together it also pushes us further apart at the same time. When I was younger, hadn't yet been married, had kids and divorced, I had spent a lot of my time alone. Usually walking someplace, watching TV, or trying to solve a problem on the computer when I used to program on my old Apple ][e. Being alone then it bothered me a little, sometimes I enjoyed it but being young I was always able to find something to do to keep myself from feeling alone in life, but now.... I can't see the same things in my life to keep me distracted like I could then.
What about your friends? you may be asking.. When I was younger I move round a lot and finding true friends was not easy to find. Sometimes ended up around the wrong type of people that were going to get me nowhere but trouble. Sadly that did happen a time or two, however I was able to be able to keep myself from getting in to deep into all that. But not enough it seems that the history is still there and it effected my growth as an individual.
So, am I going around throwing kittens in to trees, running down people and robbing liquor stores? Well OBVIOUSLY NOT! However the every man for himself attitude seems to rubbed off on me and as such its been hard for me to learn to trust others, as when I had trusted the people around me they turned against me in most ways that its not even worth mentioning here. So here I sit.... Alone... Trying to trust others and being left disappointed every time I try. Do I stop trying? No. I take precautions and keep the people around me at a "safe" distance from me and not letting them in all the way, or at the very least only letting them know what only whats important at the time. Always worried that they will try to do the same thing that the others in my past have done to take advantage of me.
When I was married, I still was unable to fill that void. Not that I didn't try to fill it with what I could do, but I failed it seems. At some point I may give up trying, but not today. Or anytime soon I hope. Sometimes I wonder with the adversities that I had experienced in my life why I never turned to drugs or alcohol to try to fill the gaps in my life. I always attributed it to having a strong will, but at the same time that strong will is crushing my life in to the loneliness that I bare today.
Well until that loneliness that fills me can be replaced with something or someone that I can believe in 100%. As I don't see that happening anytime soon, I will trudge along in life, alone and lonely.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
And a Merry Xmas to you as well. Next time use all your fingers please!
Good morning and a Merry Xmas, Happy holidays, and a happy whatever you celebrate!
With that out of the way it seems that during this time of year we seem to get more stressed out than ever. Even over the littlest of things. Recently I was in one of local stores with my youngest daughter shopping for a gift for her sister and over heard (well it was kinda hard NOT to) two women having an argument over something, and as one of the "ladies" walked away from the other she had said to the other "if you would take your head out of your A$$" and at that point I just happened to get see her and see the look on her face at this reply, I must say it was one of quite surprise. At least in my observation anyway. At this time of the year this is a time to be with friends and family, but this year I'm guessing that won't happen for many due to the weather and they are stressed out for sure. As far as seeing people flying only a few fingers, well you would think that being the season that it is that you would see less of that, but as our stress trying to get things done, and get places around in the nasty weather it seems to be happening with greater frequency. You would think that in this weather that people would show a little more restraint in doing that as someday they may find them selves at the mercy and in the ditch of someone that they just did the one finger salute to moments ago. I'm not saying that I want for anyone flying me the one finger salute to end up in the ditch.... Well maybe just a little... But overall no.... People should learn to relax and enjoy this time of year, even if the people around them are not only stressing you out and just wish that you could give them the Homer Simpson neck massage that he gives Bart.
With that said, I have but one more thing to say on this....
Enjoy the holiday everyone!
With that out of the way it seems that during this time of year we seem to get more stressed out than ever. Even over the littlest of things. Recently I was in one of local stores with my youngest daughter shopping for a gift for her sister and over heard (well it was kinda hard NOT to) two women having an argument over something, and as one of the "ladies" walked away from the other she had said to the other "if you would take your head out of your A$$" and at that point I just happened to get see her and see the look on her face at this reply, I must say it was one of quite surprise. At least in my observation anyway. At this time of the year this is a time to be with friends and family, but this year I'm guessing that won't happen for many due to the weather and they are stressed out for sure. As far as seeing people flying only a few fingers, well you would think that being the season that it is that you would see less of that, but as our stress trying to get things done, and get places around in the nasty weather it seems to be happening with greater frequency. You would think that in this weather that people would show a little more restraint in doing that as someday they may find them selves at the mercy and in the ditch of someone that they just did the one finger salute to moments ago. I'm not saying that I want for anyone flying me the one finger salute to end up in the ditch.... Well maybe just a little... But overall no.... People should learn to relax and enjoy this time of year, even if the people around them are not only stressing you out and just wish that you could give them the Homer Simpson neck massage that he gives Bart.
With that said, I have but one more thing to say on this....
Enjoy the holiday everyone!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Throw another sushi log on the fire!
Good morning ALL!
It's just a few days away from Xmas, and another night loading trucks. Well i had said in my mini blog at http://www.twitter.com/packard_sonic that I would get about 4 hours of sleep before they called and I wasn't too far off the mark. Got maybe 4 1/2 hours of sleep in before for they called. Well I know what your asking what does that have to do with sushi? Well that's a good question and here is the answer... Absolutely NOTHING! Well except that after a relatively light night, except that they put everything all over the place from every route, it was a pain to sort before i had to sort all the skids. Nothing was in order which thew me off some what, but managed to get it done within a somewhat reasonable amount of time. Well now for the part of the day that ACTUALLY involves the sushi part.
After we got done with unloading the semi and loading the smaller trucks with stuff, I was sitting there doing my log books and the dispatcher says to me, "Look what i brought." It was sushi! I had never tried sushi before, and he was going on how expensive it was, which for 6 rolls of various wrapped fish was the same amount as a Whopper meal at the BK. Well he offered some to me and i figured, what the hell, give it a try. I'm not to apposed to trying new things. You can't live your entire life in a bubble, no matter how hard you want or don't want to. So I chose the seaweed wrapped crab meat. I figured, it looked better than the other ones. It was odd how it felt in my hand and I generally try things without sauce for the first time so I know what it tastes like without extra stuff on it. Well the first bite was to say an interesting one, and my first thought, and being totally honest here was "HOW DO PEOPLE EAT THIS STUFF?" Now mind you maybe it wasn't fresh, which when it comes to eating raw fish do you want it any fresher? I mean IT'S RAW!
Anyway, I found it to be very gritty, and kinda sweet but yet almost unpalatable at the same time. Not to be rude I did eat the entire wrap that was offered to me, but declined to have another. Now here is the strange part about it. On my way home I could still sort of taste it in my mouth, and I was getting more of that sweetness in my mouth (after taste) and something in my head said, maybe you want another one.. I had to nearly slap myself up for thinking that! I mean I didn't enjoy it when your eating it and I want another?? I can't remember ever having something that was just not very good tasting and saying to myself that I should have more!
In a nutshell, I don't think I will be having it again anytime soon, that is unless some one can prove to me that what I had was not the best made. I mean it could be possible. Well anyway, I have a feeling its going to be an interesting day.
Later...
It's just a few days away from Xmas, and another night loading trucks. Well i had said in my mini blog at http://www.twitter.com/packard_sonic that I would get about 4 hours of sleep before they called and I wasn't too far off the mark. Got maybe 4 1/2 hours of sleep in before for they called. Well I know what your asking what does that have to do with sushi? Well that's a good question and here is the answer... Absolutely NOTHING! Well except that after a relatively light night, except that they put everything all over the place from every route, it was a pain to sort before i had to sort all the skids. Nothing was in order which thew me off some what, but managed to get it done within a somewhat reasonable amount of time. Well now for the part of the day that ACTUALLY involves the sushi part.
After we got done with unloading the semi and loading the smaller trucks with stuff, I was sitting there doing my log books and the dispatcher says to me, "Look what i brought." It was sushi! I had never tried sushi before, and he was going on how expensive it was, which for 6 rolls of various wrapped fish was the same amount as a Whopper meal at the BK. Well he offered some to me and i figured, what the hell, give it a try. I'm not to apposed to trying new things. You can't live your entire life in a bubble, no matter how hard you want or don't want to. So I chose the seaweed wrapped crab meat. I figured, it looked better than the other ones. It was odd how it felt in my hand and I generally try things without sauce for the first time so I know what it tastes like without extra stuff on it. Well the first bite was to say an interesting one, and my first thought, and being totally honest here was "HOW DO PEOPLE EAT THIS STUFF?" Now mind you maybe it wasn't fresh, which when it comes to eating raw fish do you want it any fresher? I mean IT'S RAW!
Anyway, I found it to be very gritty, and kinda sweet but yet almost unpalatable at the same time. Not to be rude I did eat the entire wrap that was offered to me, but declined to have another. Now here is the strange part about it. On my way home I could still sort of taste it in my mouth, and I was getting more of that sweetness in my mouth (after taste) and something in my head said, maybe you want another one.. I had to nearly slap myself up for thinking that! I mean I didn't enjoy it when your eating it and I want another?? I can't remember ever having something that was just not very good tasting and saying to myself that I should have more!
In a nutshell, I don't think I will be having it again anytime soon, that is unless some one can prove to me that what I had was not the best made. I mean it could be possible. Well anyway, I have a feeling its going to be an interesting day.
Later...
Monday, December 22, 2008
Good morning headache fans & another dime lost!
Well another day another dime. Well another dime I wont be making right now as I am NOT at work this morning. I think my manager is trying to punish me for refusing to do that other run, which every time I have done that run, it has messed with my personal and professional life. I mean if something went wrong every time you did it wouldn't YOU not want to do that as well?
Well that aside from that, I have been sleeping the weirdest hours, either too little for a week at a time with very little sleep then doing a mega sleep at the end o the week sleeping 10 hrs or so. Well the last few days, I have had the chance to actually sleep the "correct" number of hours we are supposed be sleeping. What do I get for doing the right thing? A HEADACHE! UGGHH! I can't seem to win for loosing here! This is just insane! I REALLY don't want to start taking meds to try to sleep as that just will make me feel like im walking around like a zombie the rest of the day and for several days later. So what are my options?
At this moment. I really don't know......
Well that aside from that, I have been sleeping the weirdest hours, either too little for a week at a time with very little sleep then doing a mega sleep at the end o the week sleeping 10 hrs or so. Well the last few days, I have had the chance to actually sleep the "correct" number of hours we are supposed be sleeping. What do I get for doing the right thing? A HEADACHE! UGGHH! I can't seem to win for loosing here! This is just insane! I REALLY don't want to start taking meds to try to sleep as that just will make me feel like im walking around like a zombie the rest of the day and for several days later. So what are my options?
At this moment. I really don't know......
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Desk cleaning
Well I finally got around to cleaning my desk off. and just got rid of all the papers that were cluttering my desk. I have set up my video camera for at least a little while. And have set up a new video site at http://ustream.tv/channel/packard-sonic. That is, on the days I decide to stream the video.
Still fixing program that have been moved around on the computer that got messed up from the Mac OS X 10.5.6 update. That was a lot of work and it may take weeks if noth months to get things just where i had it from before.
Well may post again later.
Still fixing program that have been moved around on the computer that got messed up from the Mac OS X 10.5.6 update. That was a lot of work and it may take weeks if noth months to get things just where i had it from before.
Well may post again later.
And Xmas 4 days away..
Good morning all!
With Xmas just 4 days away, and This year I let the kids pick out a gift for them selves. I had said b4 I had kids I wouldn't do that, but here I did it anyway. Seeing how they are 11 and 14 it's getting hard to get gifts for them that I know they would like. Plus lets not leave out the fact that they are girls to boot! Although my oldest daughter is more boyish then her younger sister, she is still a girl none the less.
However, I will be getting them both a gift after tax season, to get them both something nice. It's really becoming that tax day or I should say when taxes are returned that is more of the day before Xmas.
Well with little to do today, I'm sure something will pop up for me to do.
Later all!
With Xmas just 4 days away, and This year I let the kids pick out a gift for them selves. I had said b4 I had kids I wouldn't do that, but here I did it anyway. Seeing how they are 11 and 14 it's getting hard to get gifts for them that I know they would like. Plus lets not leave out the fact that they are girls to boot! Although my oldest daughter is more boyish then her younger sister, she is still a girl none the less.
However, I will be getting them both a gift after tax season, to get them both something nice. It's really becoming that tax day or I should say when taxes are returned that is more of the day before Xmas.
Well with little to do today, I'm sure something will pop up for me to do.
Later all!
Saturday, December 20, 2008
First Full Blog Posting
Hello all!
Well this will be the first FULL posting of my blog. You can follow my micro blog which I publish to daily or semi daily depending on how busy my life is currently at the time at the following address: http://www.twitter.com/Packard_Sonic
Well today Is Saturday Dec 20 2008, and the kids will be here till Dec 25, when their mother will come and pick them up. I am looking forward to having them here for most of the week as this year Xmas falls on a Thursday this year.
Little later today going to take the kids out so they can buy some gifts. Did some of that last night but it got kinda late as i had a busy night at work that morning and was pretty busy trying to get the trucks i load with mail to be delivered.
Will update later on.
Have a good day today!
Well this will be the first FULL posting of my blog. You can follow my micro blog which I publish to daily or semi daily depending on how busy my life is currently at the time at the following address: http://www.twitter.com/Packard_Sonic
Well today Is Saturday Dec 20 2008, and the kids will be here till Dec 25, when their mother will come and pick them up. I am looking forward to having them here for most of the week as this year Xmas falls on a Thursday this year.
Little later today going to take the kids out so they can buy some gifts. Did some of that last night but it got kinda late as i had a busy night at work that morning and was pretty busy trying to get the trucks i load with mail to be delivered.
Will update later on.
Have a good day today!
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